CONNORisms

Anyone who has been around kids knows how funny they can be. I tell Aaron all the time that I don't know what we did before we had Connor because he keeps us so entertained. I keep a list on my phone of funny and sweet things Connor says that I want to remember forever. Eventually I am going to put them in a notebook for him to read when he's older, but for now I will just post them on here. I have had this list going since right after his birthday, when I last wrote about some of his funny quotes, so here they are up until today!

A bunch of us are sitting at the table while out at dinner. 

Levi: Connor, are you spoiled?

Connor: *Looks up in the air away from everyone and starts singing* Jingle bells, jingle bells....

{Well that's one way to change the subject. I think we all know the answer to that question anyways.}

We are making a pizza at home.

Connor: Don't put SPICYronis {pepperonis} on my pizza.

Aaron and I are putting Connor to bed.

Connor: Can you lay with me?

Aaron: Okay.

Connor: Your my best friend in here.

Aaron: What about mommy? 

Connor: She's my best girl.

We are on the water bus in Venice sitting extra close to a lady with a hearing aid.

Connor: Hey! What is that? Her worms? {talking about the cord coming out of the hearing aid}

Connor was talking to our friend Kelsey right after she had a baby.

Connor: *Looking at her belly and pointing* You empty now?

Just chit chatting.

Me: Connor, am I your best friend?

Connor: No, you're my best girl. 

I don't remember the background of this convo, but boy is he honest!

Me: I love you

Connor: I don't love you

Me: What? Why?

Connor: You make me mad.

I'm mopping the house and Connor grabs the mop and acts like he's reading the directions on it.

Connor: It says no mommies do it. Boys do it.

Me: *hands over mopping duties forever*

Connor and I are making blueberry muffins. He is really into reading directions these days and he was going along pointing at the pictures as he read them.

Connor: I already do blueberries, I already do eggs, I already do water {milk}, I already do cheese {oil}.

Connor and I are laying on the couch and he smells my hand.

Connor: Mommy, you smell beautiful!

Then the next day we are playing on the rug and he tells me to smell the back of his leg. I was so confused and asked him over and over what he wanted me to do. Well it was the same thing over and over. So I did it hesitantly. 

Connor: Does it smell beautiful?

Me:* burst out into laughter*

I'm not sure what we were doing, but Connor always knows the right thing to say to make me feel special.

Connor: Mommy you're pretty. You're pretty all day.

We are listening to music. (I'm pretty sure it was Justin Timberlake)

Connor: Mommy, I listen to the music with my body. *makes cute little dance move*

We are laying in bed and it's 7:30am.

Connor: I'm getting starving.

I was getting mad at Connor for something.

Connor: Mommy, I'm mad. 

Me: Me too.

Connor: No you're not. Only kids mad.

It was 4:10am and Connor was laying on my pillow. I moved him to his and he got upset with me.

Connor: Hey! You pushed me off. Say sorry.

Me: Sorry, but you were on my pillow.

Connor: *now on his pillow* I have a pillow, want it? We can share.

Connor was watching Aaron work on his new computer.

Connor: Good job daddy. Awesome job doing that!

I was putting Connor to bed and telling him that I love him like I do every night.

Me: I love you.

Connor: I love you too.

Me: I love you more.

Connor: I love you more too.

Me: I love you mostest.

Connor: I love you giant!

*This one is grosse, but funny to me as a parent because they have no filter* Connor is in the restroom. 

Connor: My booty hurts. My poop is trying to push out.

I'm working out in the living room.

Me: Ugh! I'm tired.

Connor: Do you want to come lay down in my bed, honey? 

Me: *Thinking I have no idea where he got "honey" from.*

I'm getting Connor ready for school and he doesn't want to go.

Connor: They said not again. Not again school ever.

Me: Who's they?

Connor: Teachers.

I was putting a dress on Pearl.

Connor: Now Pearl's not naked? Her a beautiful girl.

8/9/16 Connor's using the bathroom and I'm standing there waiting for him.

Connor: I have a willy just like Holden.Girls have one of those *pointing at me.* You have a cootie? Girls have cooties. Kids have willys and moms have cooties.

8/17/16 Aaron, Connor, Pearl, and I are all laying in bed at night. Kylie stayed outside.

Connor: It's our whole family.

Aaron: Except for Kylie.

Connor: Awwww. Let's go downstairs and be our whole family. 

8/18/16 Connor is in a lovey mood playing with Pearl.

Connor: I love Pearl

Me: She loves you.

Connor: I love all of y'all. I love Kylie. I love you. I love daddy. *looks out the window* I love cars. I love house.

Connor is playing in his play kitchen and comes to me with his apron and chef hat.

Connor: Mommy, you make me a food cooker?

Me: A chef? 

Connor: Yes, a chef. A food cooker.

8/21/16 We are at the market and Connor sees a naked mannequin.

Connor: I've never seen a naked girl before out here.

Connor is playing with legos and putting them in a baggie.

Me: Can I see it?

Connor: It's $50. You can't break it.

9/2/16 Connor knows not to say bad words. I don't use them, but *cough* Aaron does. He tries to be careful and not use them around Connor, but sometimes they just come out. Well we were driving to Croatia and Connor startes getting frustrated.

Connor: It's not working. *a word that sounds like fuck, but we aren't sure what it was* 

Aaron: What did you say?!?

Connor: Not a bad word.

9/6/16 Aaron put cologne on Connor and he came upstairs to find me.

Connor: Mommy, smell me!

Me: You smell so good!

Connor: I'm keeping this forever on me.

While we are driving home from dinner that night

Aaron: Bubba, you're my best boy.

Connor: You're my best dad, and I'm your best Connor. And you're my best girl mom.

Aaron: We're going to go home and you're going to go potty and we will put your Batman clothes on.

Connor: Oh yeah! I like THATman clothes. 

{To this day he still calls Batman >>> Thatman}

9/10/16 We are driving in Nove and I see a CAT tractor.

Me: Cat! *pointing at the tractor*

Connor: Where?

Aaron: Not the animal, the tractor.

Connor: Cats don't sit on tractors.  

9/16/16 Connor's new favorite thing to do is pretend to be an animal at the pet store. He then tells me to ask out loud which pet I want in hopes that I pick him. Well we were on the phone with my mom and she started playing along.

Memaw: Hi kitty cat.

Connor: I'm not a kitty cat anymore. I'm a person now!

9/18/16 I Was talking to my mom about my birthday coming up and Connor got in on the conversation.

Me: Are you going to do something special for my birthday?

Connor: Ah huh! I'm going to get you lipstick.

Me: That's my boy!

9/22/16 Connor was laying in bed and yells for Aaron and me to come upstairs.

Aaron: What is it?

Connor: *pointing out the window* Airplane stars! 

9/24/16 We were waiting in line for a churro at the food truck festival.

Connor: Uhhhh.... you give me a chocolate please. 

*The man never looked up or responded to him.*

Connor: Sir??

9/27/16 Trying to get Connor to finish his lunch.

Connor: I only eat my rice and then I can have my dessert?

Me: No. You have to eat your rice and carrots and then you can have your dessert.

Connor: That doesn't sound like a good deal.

That's it, for now! I hope you thought they were as funny and sweet as I did. I never knew being a mom would be this fun, and I love it! Thank you Connor for keeping me entertained, on my toes, and always laughing. I love you!

XOXO,

Jenn